The Gospel According to Showgirls
Inspired by the spirit of Nomi Malone, I feel compelled to bring you a recently written passage as divinely inspired unto me. Peace and cum be with you.
From the Psalms of Nomi, Chapter 7:
The stripper pole is my shepherd, I shall not want.
It maketh me rub my vag and licketh its oily surface:
It leadeth me down to the stage and up to the rafters.
It restoreth my titties:
It leadeth me in paths of NOT SLUTTINESS for it's names' sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of greasy men,
I will drink Cristal: for thy shining surface is with me:
Their rods and their staffs will penetrate me.
Thou preparest the stage before me in the presence of Cristal Connors;
Thou annointest my head with lube; my vag runneth over.
Surely fame and penetration will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in Versace at Cesar's Palace forever.
Amen.
From the Psalms of Nomi, Chapter 7:
The stripper pole is my shepherd, I shall not want.
It maketh me rub my vag and licketh its oily surface:
It leadeth me down to the stage and up to the rafters.
It restoreth my titties:
It leadeth me in paths of NOT SLUTTINESS for it's names' sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of greasy men,
I will drink Cristal: for thy shining surface is with me:
Their rods and their staffs will penetrate me.
Thou preparest the stage before me in the presence of Cristal Connors;
Thou annointest my head with lube; my vag runneth over.
Surely fame and penetration will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in Versace at Cesar's Palace forever.
Amen.
posted by Infused Confusion at
3:02 PM
2 Comments:
I love going to church... of showgirls.
Ironically, my word verification is iuexalt. In other words, it is I you exalt.
By
Anonymous, At
12:53 PM
This is great.
I have one word:
HOLLLA!!!!!
By
Copy Editor, At
4:13 PM
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